Thoughts on Nag Panchami

Namaste readers - you might remember this time around a year ago I made a post concerning the Hindu holiday Nag Panchami. Well, more specifically, it was about a dream I had that seemed influenced by it...more specifically a dream where a king cobra snake wanted to be my best friend, just about. In the intervening time between then and now, obviously no snakes became my friends. Yet I still think about this holiday, and cobras in general, from time to time.

I had the silly idea of posting about this dream on Yahoo Answers, and as one might expect, I got trolled pretty badly. But one answer seemed legitimate and made sense - since the snake in that dream wanted to be my friend, and snakes feature pretty prominently in Hindu iconography, this person speculated that perhaps it meant that I should fully embrace Hinduism, and that not only had I nothing to fear from it, but that I would benefit immensely from it.

I would say this to be spot on. My faith may have waxed and waned from time to time, as anyone's faith is prone to do, but in both the real and spiritual sense I have had nothing but good results from my embrace of the Hindu faith and culture. Right now my only wish is to go deeper, further immerse myself.

So to the king cobra in that dream, I say thank you...and to those readers who observe it, thank you as well, and have a blessed Nag Panchami this year.

Random Bits

Namaste readers! For some reason I'm feeling restless, in a sort of good way...I want to do something to get these thoughts in my head to form something coherent. So in an attempt to do so I'm going to post just what the subject of this blog post says: random bits. What sort of random bits? Well, stuff related to the thoughts in my head right now, and as for what those are, keep reading to find out! :)

• Devotion to Lord Ganesha. Thoughts of Him are prominent in my mind right now, mainly in the way of asking for guidance. It's like I don't know how to proceed in life this very moment. I know what I want, but not how to get it or when, etc. So to beseech Sri Ganesha for guidance, I shall post this link to the Classical Yoga Hindu Academy page on Lord Ganesha.
• Wanting to meet people. Not quite sure how to explain this beyond feeling lonely and wanting to mitigate that feeling. It seems like a lot of nights I spend alone despite my best efforts to reach out to people to talk to. I know many people by now, and yet I still desire some kind of companionship constantly.
• Work to be done. Yes, I do have other writing assignments I could work on right now, but my brain just doesn't want to think that way. That's kind of one reason why I'm writing this, to try to gently coax my mind into working on other things.
• How to deepen my Hindu practice. I guess this goes in the same category as devotion to Lord Ganesha, but...well, I need some more advice in this regard. I know one obvious thing I could do is work towards becoming vegetarian, but I honestly don't know if I'm ready to make that leap yet, especially since I'm on a diet involving pre-packaged food. And I got to learn how to cook better too.
• How to better myself in general. Part of me still doesn't know how to act around people, what are appropriate boundaries, if I'm saying certain things (like "sorry") too much, etc. One would think after 29 years alive I'd have all this figured out, but no. It's like I'm incapable of learning these finer points.

That's about all the random bits I can think of right now, at least the ones that are most inclusive and least redundant. I don't want to get too specific for obvious reasons, but hopefully after this bout of random thought dumping my mind can become clearer.

A Week of Accomplishments

Namaste readers!

This past week has been, as the subject line says, a week of accomplishments. I feel...well, accomplished! From finding new freelance writing work (hopefully...I have my foot in the door, at least), to getting a new computer, to helping out the Hindu Temple of Rochester with their Hanuman Murthy Sthapana, I've had a busy week. Helping out my local temple is the thing of note here, as how I helped is I got the company I work for to buy ad space in the brochure being handed out at the actual Hanuman Murthy Sthapana event.

It may sound like I'm tooting my own horn here, but...can't I do that occasionally? I know it's proper seva (service) to not expect rewards for one's community service, and I'm not expecting any, but I still feel like I need to shout my accomplishments to the world every once in a while. Again, it's that recognition, that positive feedback I crave. Maybe my soul isn't quite ready for truly selfless service yet...

Perhaps I crave this sort of positive feedback because I feel I've been held back for so long. I've been told that I've been a sub-par human being for so long that I want to prove otherwise. I may not need to prove it, but the urge is still there for some reason.

I know Shri Hanuman, the incarnation of Lord Shiva that selflessly served Lord Rama in the Ramayana never wanted reward...but I'm still human. By that, I mean I can strive to have qualities like the Gods, but I'm most certainly not one myself.

All I'm asking for is for people to recognize that fact...and that in spite of that I'm still willing to help people.

Duality

Namaste readers.

First of all, I wanted to apologize (once again!) for the whiny tone of my last post (which I deleted). I won't obsess over the past in this case, but I still need to learn how not to repeat my mistakes.

All this being said, one conclusion I've arrived at is that when it comes to having a healthy self-image - one that respects the self as well as others in balance - duality, or dualistic thinking, isn't conducive for it. I was gravitated to Hinduism in part because it did not promote dualistic thinking. I know sometimes there are things which only can be seen in black and white, or right and wrong; I do not deny that there are times when wrongness shouldn't be tolerated.

But when it comes to the self and paths to one's salvation, one needs to realize that there are at once many paths...and just one. I was reminded of this in a forum post where a fellow forum user said that the Bhagavad Gita teaches that in order to reach the One, one must abandon the concept of two.

I'll have to look into that, but for right now, know that I'm feeling better, and can hopefully resume my path, readers. :-)

Lord Krishna on the Brain

*wipes away the dust from the blog* Yeah, I know it's been a while since I've posted with any sort of regularity here. Truth be told, I've been a little discouraged about this blog...it just doesn't seem to be having the reach I want it to have. However, I'm definitely not giving up! I've written over a hundred posts to this blog so far, why stop now?

With that in mind, as you probably have guessed this blog post is about Lord Krishna. Thing is, though, this isn't an informational post on Him...rather, I'm requesting information. He's somehow been on my mind lately, even going so far as entering one of my dreams! Still, though, I know next to nothing about Him. I know the basics: He's an incarnation of Lord Vishnu, He is a central character of the Hindu epic the Mahabharata...and that's about it. I've seen His depiction in art, and I do have to say one thing that moves me about Him is the fact that he's depicted as having blue skin. That says a lot to me - it says to me, personally, that skin color shouldn't matter when it comes to divinity. That says volumes to me.

So, I am hoping for some good sources on Lord Krishna, so I can figure out why I've been so fascinated by Him lately. The internet is there for a reason, I know, but there's a lot of misinformation and inaccuracy out there...therefore if I can be pointed in the right direction, that'd be great!

A Special Request For My Readers

Namaste readers!

I am posting to my blog today to make a special request. This request hopefully won't come off as presumptuous or too demanding, but I figured the only way to know if my readers would be interested in this is to ask them. :-)

So, the request: as you readers know (if you follow my blog long enough), I am a devotee of the guru H. H. Sri Sri Ravi Shankar, who is better known as the spiritual leader of the Art of Living organization. More info on the Art of Living can be found here.

The Art of Living regularly hosts courses and retreats throughout the world, a few of which are hosted by H. H. Sri Sri Ravi Shankar himself. A course/retreat being held in the Art of Living's new ashram in Boone, North Carolina is one of these courses hosted by Sri Sri.

The problem is...it's expensive. And I'm not going to lie to you - it's a bit out of my financial reach at the moment.

Which is why I've created this online fundraiser at YouCaring.com.

I know it seems to ask a lot of my readers, asking for support of something like this. But...well, if you read this blog, you probably have at least some interest as to my spiritual well-being. Otherwise, why read it? :-)

If you're interested in supporting me in this endeavor, please consider giving to the online fundraiser at the link above. Please note that at the moment, you need a PayPal account to give.

If you care about this, then please give. Or don't if you don't think it's worth it. It's up to you.

Writing Eases the Pain

Namaste readers,

As you've probably seen on this blog before (at least if you've been following it for a while), there have been some points where I write really negative posts where I'm down on myself or something/someone else. I know no one wants to read such self-deprecating whining, but I still do it.

Why? Because oddly enough, I find it therapeutic. It's like the subject line of this post says - writing eases the pain. Problem is, writing to ease pain also seems to drive away readers. No one wants to listen to a self-loathing whiner bitch and moan all day.

Therefore, I am hoping to get some advice on what I can do to change this. I need to find some other way to let out the pain, without exposing myself to the world in a way that might jeopardize me. So far writing has been the best way to let out all my angst, depression, anxiety, and other negative emotions, but I need to find another outlet.

Sure, there's meditation (and video games in my case!), but that doesn't seem to have any immediate effect, whereas writing does. I need some other way to get an immediate release valve. If any of you readers have advice on that, I would gladly like to hear it.